Tuesday, February 27, 2007
i love my random moments.
dont you?
gotta stop thinking of you
whimsical nonsense @ 10:57 PM
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Sunday, February 25, 2007
Step one you say we need to talk
He walks you say sit down it’s just a talk
He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through
Some sort of window to your right
As he goes left and you stay right
Between the lines of fear and blame
And you begin to wonder why you came
Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
Let him know that you know best
Cause after all you do know best
Try to slip past his defense
Without granting innocence
Lay down a list of what is wrong
The things you’ve told him all along
And pray to God he hears you
And pray to god he hears you and
Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
As he begins to raise his voice
You lower yours and grant him one last choice
Drive until you lose the road
Or break with the ones you’ve followed
He will do one of two things
He will admit to everything
Or he’ll say he’s just not the same
And you’ll begin to wonder why you came
Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
How to save a life
How to save a life
Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
How to save a life
How to save a life
How to Save a Life - The Fray
whimsical nonsense @ 9:29 PM
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Thursday, February 22, 2007
are you a victim of scs? (sam chan stress)
it is not a contagious disease, it is just a problem
that has widespread effects on others.
so sam chan, who at times get scs,
will suffer from scs and then affect those around him
and so if you have been affected,
then you're a victim!
the following are just a few of the common symptoms of scs
if you have experienced it from sam chan,
please try to understand the circumstances.
and while sam chan is trying his best to take medication for scs
it takes time, so he requests patience.
he too asks for your forgiveness for his behaviour during his many bouts of scs.
any loss of friendship no matter how small is highly regrettable.
symptoms:
high levels of irritability - basically sam chan becomes easily irritated and frustrated and so takes it out on those around him
low tolerance levels - his threshold for silly things become unusually low and his serious nature takes the driving seat of a tank and charges through to take pole position at the start of the day
rashness - sam chan becomes extremely rash, doing things without thinking. the reactions are usually done in anger or with an irritated mood. an effect of the earlier 2 symptoms
increased pettiness - this is largely a grey area but it has been cited as a possible symptom
bluntness coupled with insensitivity - results in sam chan saying things of an extremely insensitive nature, with the potential for unintentional hurt. warning: extremely dangerous. has the ability to cause serious damage to friendships
temperamental - sam chan becomes even more bad tempered than normal, resulting in increased rashness and bluntness and insensitivity, as being pissed off acts as a catalyst for such bad actions usually
lack of focus - due to the increased stress levels, brain, already with a low capacity to retain information fails even more. unable to focus and retain information properly.
etc
there are probably quite a few more symptoms, but these are the more common and more prevalent ones. while sam chan is doing all he can to keep scs under control, he knows that it is beyond him to be cured, and so once again requests understanding.
thre are ways to help sam chan, (not really by calling 1800 or 1900 hotlines), but please use your brain and see what is best for him.
any form of help is welcome.
do your bit, and please minimise the negative effects of sam chan stress.
thanks.
sc
whimsical nonsense @ 11:18 PM
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Wednesday, February 21, 2007
i used to think of sunny weather.
nice fluffy white clouds
with the rays of sun illuminating the world below
and everything is happy.
a gentle breeze, dancing stalks of flowers
in rhythm with the sway of the grass.
nice eh? to me it is.
and i realise its not like that.
dark ominous clouds, overcast skies.
too thick a layer for the bright rays of the sun to penetrate
shrouding the world in gloom.
little vegetation survive, only weeds.
even then they sprout out sparingly
it is as if they fear something
to exist in the world outside.
and so i walk down the path
which leads to somewhere.
a wall.
there is no turning back,
and of course no one is stupid enough to climb over the wall
for the fact that you cannot.
so you have to find a way through.
it is not that difficult though, for there is a gate.
a large gate that is visible to the naked eye. more than visible.
but unknown to many, there is another, smaller gate.
much more difficult to find, and not many has been successful
for they search and search, yet fail.
i tried my best, or so i thought. at times i found it.
and as i tried to walk through, i became distracted.
and turn my eyes away from it.
i look back, and i lose sight of that hard to find gate.
again i try to look for it. i think.
at times i totally give up, exclaiming, "forget it!"
and walk to the large gate.
and thats where i fall.
i stumble. i fall.
pick myself up?
hm
sc
whimsical nonsense @ 11:25 PM
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Sunday, February 18, 2007
i see work on chinese new year
being the slacker i am
i shift it to the back of my mind.
hahahaha
i have nothing else to say
shall go back and read those books that normal teenage girls read
the one by meg cabot
omg they're really interesting!
i shall be a teenage girl!
sc
whimsical nonsense @ 10:06 PM
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Saturday, February 17, 2007
haha its chinese new year already
so fast
somehow it doesnt really feel like
at the present moment
but going for reunion dinner just now
might just start something...
haha
i sense a few kgs coming on...
a few inches round the waist...
FATS!
o dear...
but its chinese new year!
haha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
madness
sc
whimsical nonsense @ 10:11 PM
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Thursday, February 15, 2007
valentines day.
haha.
today we sang veggie tales. the class sang the song.
haha it was hilarious!
and almost everyone who found some humour in it were laughing
and trying to sing at the same time.
haha now i know why i don't mind being in this class.
i wont say i love it to bits,
but then again, its not a place where i hate to be.
a villain amongst the heroes.
sc
whimsical nonsense @ 12:02 AM
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Tuesday, February 13, 2007
这 blogpost 会有一点华语在里面。
as such you can see the sad state of my chinese. haha.
ive started a love affair.
and i don't really want it to end.
not now at least.
how fitting.
a day before valentines day.
awwww
a love affair with potcost and lotrost (tto)
a love affair reignited with the infinite shapes above
a love affair filled with the passion of red, innocence of white, against a mysterious black
to run like the wind, across the seven seas
to adapt to conditions, full of surprises
to stand out, and make a bold statement
to cross swords
to create awe
to cause exclamations
im so in love
haha
sc
whimsical nonsense @ 11:27 PM
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Monday, February 12, 2007
it was meant to be a happy occasion
yet smiles were forced.
it was meant to be a joyous event
yet laughter rang hollow.
it was meant to be so much more
than just this.
i shall refrain from giving the details about the escapades of last night,
indeed something worth while to remember.
the hours spent counting, laying it all out, walking around barefooted.
entering places we shouldnt really be entering...
the major thing. haha shhhh
you've got to grow up sam chan,
like seriously. stop being the child you are.
its irritating, its getting on my nerves!
you have got to put an end to all this immature thinking,
do not be so naive any longer, for it makes you look foolish.
foolish enough to believe what people say so easily,
foolish to be so gullible.
i know the thoughts running through your head,
they are irrational and only further exposes the maturity level of your thought processes,
a level befitting that of a newly-born infant.
the mindset you have now needs to be changed,
and please do it.
lest you find yourself all alone. dead.
and i know my mind is failing me, for im failing myself.
Chan Yinghao Samuel.
who is he?
i struggle to find an answer.
whimsical nonsense @ 9:28 PM
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Sunday, February 11, 2007
sometimes i think that im walking into a hole.
and then i fall down and down and down.
and i realise im such a fool.
to walk into that hole.
whimsical nonsense @ 3:23 PM
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Monday, February 05, 2007
i must restrain myself.
to not sms.
after sending 45 on saturday
and 30 on sunday.
its a lot, for me.
actually not really but i dont want another 50bux+ phone bill again
because my parents will start wondering how my bill from low 30+ to high 30+ to 40+ to now 50+
i'll get screwed?
but i hope that was some isolated case. due to the immensely lot of christmas and new year sms's i sent
i must restrain myself.
to not post emo.
because ppl are starting to think im emo.
i probably am right now, that i dont deny.
but generally? hm. maybe i dont really know what else to post about than emo stuff.
or maybe i should admit im emo.
which i dont really agree with.
ok im not thinking straight
because i have too many things going on in my head
and even more things in my heart.
meaning emotions instead of thoughts basically.
and to set any record should some scandal-monger (like me!) pass by
Love ISNT one of those emotions.
so in the words of lloyd the boyd, "o shut up!"
and dont bother trying to wonder what it could be
because im doing the same.
and its so stupid.
because im stupid.
and i failed.
whimsical nonsense @ 9:31 PM
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Sunday, February 04, 2007
yee said im random.
daniel yee.
really meh?
o btw i love that song. the one by rockapella, for the longest time.
whee!
theres physics common test tmr!
like omg.
the subject everyone dies. ok most.
the subject where i dont die just like that.
i get tortured and all, before my body gives up.
and still have other homework to do, then can study physics.
and im still online! early in the morning!
im quite screwed.
you know if you found out that this person is that person,
and not actually the person you thought this person to be,
but instead that person, and so now know two of that person,
what would you do to the identity of this person,
not to mention to differentiate between that person and that person?
o i know i know, pick me teacher pick me!
ok. this that person. you have been picked.
ooooohhhh aaaahhhhhh. ive been picked... *said in a mystical kind of tone*
ok so you see, i would do something to this person, who doesnt really exist,
because this person is that person, and then i would call that person that person
while calling that person that that person. the that person will still be the that person,
but this person will know be that that person. is this that person right teacher?
quite this that person.
im sure that made a lot of sense to you.
because it certainly made a whole lot of sense to me!
don't you just love this person, that person who now is this that person,
who btw isnt the same this that person as the other this that person,
and the other this that person is now the same as that person.
ok im lost.
haha
reminds me of what we learnt in pod. this guy, hegel and his ideas.
some dialectic process.
for everything, there exists 3 things.
thesis, anti-thesis and a synthesis.
a thesis is the idea or whatever else
anti-thesis is the counter to it
while the synthesis is the compromise of the thesis and the anti-thesis.
basically like i dunno?
ok this is rather stupid.
thesis. the earth is round.
anti-thesis. the earth is flat
synthesis. the earth is oval-shaped. or oblong or however you spell it.
which doesnt make sense. as in the thesis anti-thesis and synthesis.
because by right there should be something else.
basically the synthesis now becomes a thesis, because there will be an anti-thesis to this
and so form another synthesis and the cycle goes on.
to the point of infinity, whereby once the end has been reached and there is only one synthesis
that is then the Absolute Ideal.
thats basically his idea, or what i can remember.
which is like...o..k..
i wonder how much you can learn from that.
of course its a sort of like socratic questioning question.
hm...
pod. interesting.
yee said im random.
daniel yee.
really meh?
whimsical nonsense @ 9:52 AM
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if you said goodbye to me tonight
there would still be music left to write
what else could I do
I'm so inspired by you
that hasn't happened for the longest time
once I thought my innocence was gone
now I know that happiness goes on
that's where you found me
when you put your arms around me
I haven't been there for the longest time
ooo ooo ooo ooo for the longest time
ooo ooo ooo for the longest...
I'm that voice you're hearing in the hall
and the greatest miracle of all
is how I need you
and how you needed me too
that hasn't happened for the longest time
maybe this won't last very long
you feel so right
and I could be wrong
maybe I've been hoping too hard
I've gone this far
and it's more than I hoped for
Who knows how much further we'll go on
maybe I'll be sorry when you're gone
I'll take my chances
I forgot how nice romance is
I haven't been there for the longest time
I had second thoughts at the start
I said to myself
hold on to your heart
now I know the woman that you are
you're wonderful so far
and it's more than I hoped for
I don't care what concequence it brings
I have been a fool for lesser things
I want you so bad
I think you ought to know that
I intend to hold you for the longest time
ooo ooo ooo ooo for the longest time
ooo ooo ooo for the longest time
ooo ooo ooo ooo for the longest time
ooo ooo ooo for the longest time
For the Longest Time - Rockapella
whimsical nonsense @ 9:40 AM
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Friday, February 02, 2007
i estimate to be understated.
WHAT?!
im weird.
whimsical nonsense @ 9:32 PM
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you know what?
im such a weakling.
you think drowning is bad enough.
i sink.
i "struggle" but im actually using strokes that propel me down
instead of those that will help me keep afloat.
stuck in this miry clay
i make no attempt to free myself.
not that i could have anyway.
but i could have seeked help.
but i appear to be perfectly contented with my low-level state
i was such a fool.
still am.
whimsical nonsense @ 9:28 PM
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tmr there is the nus thing. ncs.
and i have no idea what that stands for by the way.
i wish i had my nano.
i can collect it since they already repaired it, but i don't think i can do it before tomorrow morning.
o well.
something has set me thinking,
into the purpose of everything.
the purpose of doing this, of doing that.
the purpose of its existence.
for humans, is there something more than mere existence?
my brain is fried.
whimsical nonsense @ 9:10 PM
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profile
Samuel Chan
7 January 1991
affliations
shuqun primary school
Henry Park Primary School
Anglo-Chinese School (Independent)
acdb8 / bb12thcoy / acspb / ac cross country
